SHE'S A HYPNOTIST COLLECTOR
you are a walking antique

A clothesrack, with items out to dry. A flowered dress and pillowcase hang, with a plaid shorts, a green dishtowel, and a yellow-striped button-up hung with them. A gif of an old-timey jukebox. Its lights flash yellow.

Welcome to my vintage emporium, featuring beloved sweaters that smell like cigarettes-- not to mention the occasional cigar!--, beautiful vinyl records with only slight water damage, and well-adored VHS tapes (don't worry, Wrath of Khan is still playable!)

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A line-up of three pixelated sweaters. The first sweater is grey and black with blue swirls. The second is patterned like a quilt, featuring pictures of things like pies against baby blue backgrounds and checkers. The final sweater is a dark green, and has yellow and mustard colored zigzags across the collar and sleeves.

You might be like me- forget the 7 year itch-- it's the 70 year itch that really stinks! If that's the case, why not put your feet up* at ALONG COMES'S PLAN NINE FROM VINTAGE SPACES! Have YOU got the itch? And if you do... you might want to put a tee-shirt on under that sweater.

*Any potential or confirmed customers are requested to not put their feet up on any or all antique or vintage pieces of furtiture. Unless otherwise noted... don't do it.

Oh! While I've still got you-- add me to that little black book of yours-- why not? Ring me up on my telephone in the corner to reach my answering machine! Feel free to snatch up any of the marquees I have on my sidearea there. Some link to my buddies (maybe don't snag those). Some I made! Others I caught thumbing it on the side of the I-95.

Additionally, you'll find me at P.O. Box 9847!

an image map of a monochrome ad. a hand holding a check sticks out of a computer screen. in handwritten script, arrows pointing at the check are labelled as a gift stsb
an ad from the 1970's. it is cut off. the only thing that can be seen is the legs of a man standing in front of an open refrigerator. he is wearing orange/brown slacks and dark brown shoes.